Modern Funny

Modern Funny

Morris Gallo

11/16/1999

This was sent to me, do you think its true?

From: Michael Wagner < <Email Address Redacted> >
>To: <Email Address Redacted> , <Email Address Redacted> ,
<Email Address Redacted> ,
> <Email Address Redacted> , <Email Address Redacted> , <Email Address Redacted> ,
> <Email Address Redacted> , <Email Address Redacted> , <Email Address Redacted>
>Subject: Re: Do you know anyone like this??
>Date: Tue, 16 Nov 1999 09:41:02 PST
>
>On Mon, 15 Nov 1999 09:30:57 -0700, Pierce, Jenny wrote:
>
> > This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long
> > time.
> >
> > I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a
true
> > story from the Word Perfect Helpline which was transcribed from a
> > recording
> > monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the
> >
> > Help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the

> > Word
> > Perfect organization for Termination without Cause. Actual
> > dialogue of a
> >
> >
> > former WordPerfect Customer Support employee (now I know why they
> >
> > record these conversations!)
> >
> >
> >
> > Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?
> >
> > Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect.
> >
> > What sort of trouble?
> >
> > Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
> > away.
> >
> > Went away?
> >
> > They disappeared.
> >
> > Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
> >
> > Nothing.
> >
> > Nothing?
> >
> > It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.
> >
> > Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
> >
> > How do I tell?
> >
> > Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?
> >
> > What's a sea-prompt?
> >
> > Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?
> >
> > There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I
type.
> >
> >
> > Does your monitor have a power indicator?
> >
> > What's a monitor?
> >
> > It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does
it
> > have a
> >
> >
> > little light that tells you when it's on?
> >
> > I don't know.
> >
> > Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power

>cord
> > goes into it. Can you see that?
> >
> >
> >
> > Yes, I think so.
> >
> > Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged
> > into the wall.
> >
> >
> >
> > Yes, it is.
> >
> > When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were
> >
> > two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
> >
> > No.
> >
> > Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the
> > other cable.
> >
> > Okay, here it is.
> >
> > Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the
> > back of your computer.
> >
> >
> >
> > I can't reach it.
> >
> > Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
> >
> > No.
> >
> > Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
> >
> > Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because
> > it's dark.
> >
> >
> > Dark?
> >
> > Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming
> > in from the window.
> >
> >
> >
> > Well, turn on the office light then.
> >
> > I can't.
> >
> > No? Why not?
> >
> > Because there's a power failure.
> >
> > A power... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do
> > you
> >
> > still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer
> > came in?
> >
> >
> > Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
> >
> > Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like
it
> >
> > was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
> > from.
> >
> > Really? Is it that bad?
> >
> > Yes, I'm afraid it is.
> > Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
> >
> > Tell them you're too damn stupid to own a computer.
>

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